Everyone on a site like this has met him at least once. The profile with three perfect photos, a vague bio and a story that falls apart the moment you ask to see him on camera. A verified badge is one of the ways you know the man behind a profile is real.

This piece covers what the badge means, how the check works, where it stands right now, and what you can do to trust (and be trusted) while you wait.

What the badge means

A verified tick on a profile means that man passed an ID check. It shows on his profile and on his posts.

That matters here more than most places. Men meet in person from this site, sometimes in situations that call for trust. Knowing the man you're talking to has passed an ID check is a good start. It isn't the whole picture, and the rest of this piece covers what else to look for.

Who sees your documents

This is the part that puts most men off, so here it is plainly. The check is done by Sumsub, a specialist ID-checking service. You show your ID to them, not to us. We never see or store your documents, only whether the check passed.

So when you verify, your documents never sit on our servers. What we keep is a yes or a no.

Where verification stands now

ID verification isn't open to new members yet. In Settings › Verification, the start button says Coming soon. The help article, Verifying your ID, is the place to check, and it will be updated when verification opens.

If you verified before, nothing changes for you. Your badge stays on your profile and posts.

Renewing your badge

Verification lasts 1 year. We remind you 30 days before it runs out. When it's due, Settings › Verification shows Renewal Required. Tap Renew Verification and follow the steps.

Two things trip men up:

• Nothing opened. Your browser blocked the pop-up. Allow pop-ups for realkink.men and tap the button again.
• It was rejected. Check your documents are clear, in date and fully in frame, then tap Try Again.

If you're still stuck, open a support ticket under Your account in the Help Center. Support can't see your documents, but they can check where your verification stands.

What else verification does

New accounts that haven't verified their ID can only start chats with a limited number of new people a day. It keeps most spam out of everyone's inbox. More in who can message you.

Faking it is taken seriously. Lying on verification, using someone else's ID, or helping someone underage get in is one of the hard lines in the community guidelines, and it usually ends in a ban.

Telling real from fake in the meantime

A badge is one signal. Until it's open to everyone, and even after, these work just as well.

• Video chat first. A few minutes on camera on the website tells you he is who he says. A man who always has a reason not to is telling you something.
• Read the whole profile. A finished bio, real interests and circles he's active in take effort. Fakes rarely bother.
• Keep the chat here. Nearly every scam starts by moving you to another app, where nobody can see it or help.
• Watch for money. Someone who asks you for money when you're not into findom can be reported with the reason Asked me for money (and I'm not into findom).

Being the real one

The flip side is making it easy for other men to trust you. Use photos that are actually you. Write a bio that sounds like a person. Fill in what's missing, since Settings shows how complete your profile is and what it still needs. Say yes to a quick video chat before a meet. Those things work for every member, verified or not.

Writing a profile that gets replies has more on that, and Video chat: rooms, games and the house rules shows you how to get on camera.